Friday, 7 July 2017

3 Questions to Ask Before You Say "I Do"

"How do you know when you've met the right one?”

Almost everyone asks this question at some point in their lives; unfortunately, there are not too many who get a concrete answer.  But if you're reading this article, then you're one of the lucky few.

Interestingly, the criteria for choosing a spouse can be reduced to just four key characteristics.  If you can find somebody with all four then it's highly likely that you've found your life partner.

1) Does This Person Treat Others Well?
You want to marry someone who is going to take care of you and treat you well.  How to figure it out? Simple.  Spend time with this person, and pay attention to how they treat others whom they don't necessarily care about because they're not trying to charm them.  Do they thank the attendant who pumped gas for them?  Are they courteous to people at checkout counters? Do they curse out people who don't deliver on time, like telephone operators or overworked waitresses?  Do they tend to drive aggressively, as if there's no one else on the road?  

Ask yourself questions like these and take note of the answers - because they reflect characteristics that will come out down the line.  Most people don't guard themselves so carefully that they'll hide how they treat others.  So watch them, and you'll know how they're going to treat you after you're married.

2) Do We Communicate Well With Each Other?
In other words, make sure that you understand each other.  This may seem obvious, but it's not. 
Sometimes you can see a couple in a fight and they argue for an hour, two hours, maybe even overnight.  And then, at the end of round 16, it turns out that the whole thing was just a misunderstanding:  β€œOh, I thought you meant that…That's not what you meant?  Oh, then we agree.” 

Although on an occasional basis this can happen to anyone, if it's happening constantly then it's not a good sign because that may not change.  If you're constantly misunderstanding each other, then you might want to put this relationship on hold for a while.

3) Are We Physically Attracted to Each Other?
Physical attraction is an essential part of marriage.  You cannot marry someone if you aren't physically attracted to them.  And while men arrive at this conclusion somewhat quickly, women should give themselves some more time.  Very often, a woman may not feel attracted to a man initially, but after she gets to know him she finds him much more attractive than before.
A word of caution:  Although physical attraction is essential, you can't base a marriage on physicality.  Whatever is going on physically is meant to be an expression of something deep that is happening on the emotional and spiritual level.  The rule is - make sure that physical attraction is there, but don't get swept away by it.  The other two characteristics are just as important, if not more so.

So there you have it.  The next time you date someone, put what you've learned here into practice.  It'll save you a lot of time and heartache, and you might find yourself walking down the aisle faster than you think.

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